Emotional Intimacy, Sexual Intimacy and Goals
Part of having a successful intimate life is learning how to navigate your feelings and communicate your intimate needs in a non-threatening manner. No one likes to feel that sexual or emotional needs are unilaterally defined by one person in the relationship. Work toward an intimate relationship that is powerful, honest, fulfilling, and compassionate. Your partner is not your enemy.
Learn that trust and shared communication are essential for a successful intimate partnership. Neither partner is entitled. Fear of failure, rejection, and judgment in the bedroom can derail sexual intimacy indefinitely. Allow openness, honesty, and healing from the past guide relationship bonding. Respect the fragility of your partner’s individuality to better understand their intimate needs and boundaries. We don’t have to be “naked” to be naked in front of each other. Recognize the power of emotional intimacy, and its relationship to sexual intimacy. Comfort levels with our sexuality correlate to the degrees of trust we have with ourselves and our partner. We don’t have to be intimate to have intimacy. On the other hand, we must share intimacy to be intimate. Learn and respect your partner’s definition of intimacy.
When we are asked or expected to show ourselves through physical and emotional disclosure, we quickly evaluate the risks associated with our own vulnerabilities.
Healthy sex is sex that is non-violent, mutually agreed upon, physically and emotionally satisfying, integrative, and respected by healthy boundaries.
Recognize and address the faculties of sex and personality that can become addictive and self-destructive. Define boundaries.
Porn is not intimate, by any definition of intimacy.
Sexual actions can become self-serving and addictive. Work to understand the agenda behind your desires.
We bring everything with us into the bedroom. This is shown through the ways we want or don’t want to be touched, our willingness to be fully present or completely removed, how we interpret physical touch, and if we feel safe being emotionally vulnerable.
A healthy sexual relationship is one where sex is fulfilling for both partners psychologically, emotionally, and physically.